Friday, November 5, 2010


I tried to do my hair in a ponytail this morning. My shocking lack of range of motion made a simple ponytail into a strenuous exercise. When they took the drains out they gave me this sheet.


I am not that excited about doing these exercises. Before I did them for the first time I thought they would be easy for a fast healer like me to do. You can probably guess that they were more difficult than I expected. There are the three on the front, (ball squeezing, crossed arm, broom stretch) and two more on the back (wall climb and chicken wing).

To make the exercises more exciting and desirable to do I changed the names of the exercises.

Ball Squeezing is now Stress Relief. I squeeze the ball and think of other things I want to crush.

The Crossed Arm lady reminds me of I Dream of Jeannie. You cross your arms high in front of you and then pull your arms back. I think of myself being a genie and I say "Shazam" when I grant a wish and pull my arms back.

The Broom Stretch to me sort of looks like getting ready for a Quidditch match. I channel my inner Gryffindor student as I stretch out my muscles.

At this point you are probably correctly assuming that my exercise time is quite the show for the family.

The Wall Climb is when you face the wall and climb your hands up the wall and hold the stretch. It reminds me of old time movies of people feeling the prison walls trying to find the loose to break out. Thus it is called Prison Break.

The name I hate the most is Chicken Wing. Do women who just had a major body changing surgery need to refer to their arms as chicken wings? In addition, I feel the name is misleading as the exercise is nothing at all like the popular roller skating rink and wedding reception number, " The Chicken Dance". The exercise ends in a pose with your hands locked behind your neck, in a pondering position. I think of think of this exercise as Meditation and I leave the poultry references behind.

Hopefully soon doing a ponytail in my hair will be easy again.


  1. The exercise names made me laugh out loud. It also made me wonder if the person really thought about the demographic audience. I like your interpretations better!

  2. Jeni I love reading your posts...and the names you've given your exercises:) I can totally see you Shazaming!

  3. I love your creative ideas in naming your exercises. I think I'll do a make-over on my exercises.